Dana Carvey

Pistachio Disguisey

Brent Spiner

Devlin Bowman

Jennifer Esposito

Jennifer Baker

Harold Gould

Grandfather Disguisey

James Brolin

Fabbrizio Disguisey

Austin Wolff

Barney Baker

Edie McClurg

Mother Disguisey

Maria Canals-Barrera

Sophia (as Maria Canals)

Robert Machray

Texas Man

Michael Bailey Smith

Henchman

Rachel Lederman

Texas Wife

Mark Devine

Trent

Kenan Thompson

Kenan

Jay Johnston

Rex

Jessica Simpson

Jessica Simpson

Jessica Lee Keller

Group Dancer

Vincent Riverside

Henchman

Mark Ginther

Henchman

Carrick O'Quinn

Henchman

Mitch Silpa

Henchman

Virginia Hawkins

Interview Woman

Jonathan Loughran

Security Guard

Ted Rooney

Security Guard

Brandon Molale

Doorman

Erick Avari

Cigar Maker

Phil Jones

Businessman

Michael DeLuise

Businessman

Larry Cedar

Businessman

Andrew Shaifer

Liberty Bell Security Guard

Vincent Castellanos

Art Dealer

Roger Mussenden

Waiter

Al Goto

Ninja Warrior

Simon Rhee

Ninja Warrior

Kevin Nealon

White Collar Executive

Bill Cho Lee

Mongolian Elder

Chao-Li Chi

Mongolian

Steve Gormley

German Businessman

Christel Smith

German Businesswoman

Ava Metz

Another German

Bo Derek

Herself

Barry Bernardi

Bernardo

Brian Catalano

Italian Officer

Gabriel Pimentel

Boxing Dummy

Martha Del Rio

Puerto Rican Housekeeper

Guelmarí Oppenheimer

Waitress

Tracy E. Wilson

Female Partygoer

Patricia De Leon

Waitress

Phil Fischer

Bully

Steven Hack

Chemistry Teacher

Dane Morris

Young Pistachio

Bryan Jeffrey Price

Jock

Andy Morrow

Captain America Kid

Naya Rivera

Captain America Kid

Julius Ritter

Captain America Kid

Brighton Hertford

Captain America Kid

Sandra Lindquist

Bartender

Eugene C. Palmer

Chef

Leland Crooke

Appraiser

Mike Johnson

Constitution Security Guard

Michael Lee Phillips Jr.

Constitution Security Guard

Buddy Bolton

Abe Lincoln

Stuart Quan

Ninja

Spencer Sano

Ninja

Hiro Koda

Ninja

Johnny Nguyen

Ninja

Yoshio Iizuka

Ninja

Ronn Surels

Ninja

Andy Cheng

Ninja

Steven Ho

Ninja

Tony Wilde

Doug

Berglind Icey

Big Bottom Girl

Leasi Andrews

Big Bottom Girl

Anna Marie Goddard

Big Bottom Girl

Theresa Madelin Lin

Big Bottom Girl

Adrian Armas

Group Dancer

Gustavo Vargas

Group Dancer

Paul Benshoof

Group Dancer

Oscar Orosco

Group Dancer

Andrea Bogart

Group Dancer

Paulette Maxwell

Group Dancer

Paula Abdul

Choreographer (uncredited)

Lisa Foiles

Lisa (uncredited)

Jesse V. Johnson

Thief (uncredited)

Shane Lyons

Shane (uncredited)

Michael Johnson

Himself

Cole Sprouse

Young Pistachio

Dylan Sprouse

Young Pistachio

Perry Andelin Blake

Director

Dana Carvey

Writer

Harris Goldberg

Writer

Joe Bucaro III

Stunts

Al Goto

Stunts

Barry Bernardi

Producer

Allegra Clegg

Co-Producer

Derek Dauchy

Co-Producer

Sidney Ganis

Producer

Todd Garner

Producer

Jack Giarraputo

Executive Producer

Harris Goldberg

Co-Producer

Adam Sandler

Executive Producer

Alex Siskin

Producer

Dino Stamatopoulos

Co-Producer

Marc Ellis

Original Music Composer

Peck Prior

Editor

Sandy S. Solowitz

Editor

Elizabeth Boykewich

Casting

Roger Mussenden

Casting

Alan Au

Production Design

John B. Josselyn

Art Direction

Domenic Silvestri

Art Direction

Robert Greenfield

Set Decoration

Mona May

Costume Design

Tyler Butler

Post Production Supervisor

Allegra Clegg

Unit Production Manager

Dawn Brown

Set Designer

Jeff Markwith

Set Designer

Suzan Wexler

Set Designer

Helen Geier

Casting Assistant

Ralph Coleman

Location Manager

Tom Lackey

Location Scout

Michael Dilbeck

Music Supervisor

J.J. George

Music Editor

Stuart Grusin

Music Editor

George Cawood

Title Designer

Susan Detrie

Title Designer

Nancy Karlin

Script Supervisor

Lisa Swain

Production Coordinator

Nicole Randall

Stunt Double

Peewee Piemonte

Stunts

Annie Ellis

Stunts

Peter Lyons Collister

Director of Photography

Paula Abdul

Choreographer

Carrick O'Quinn

Stunts

Clayton J. Barber

Stunts

Simon Rhee

Stunts

Ben Scott

Stunts